Each person in his life faced aggression both as an initiator and as a victim. Both positions are unpleasant in case of aggression. But for some reason, nature made us with this ability. Maybe, in general, this aggression is needed? And if so, what role does it play. What is this aggression in general?

There are so many questions that to reveal them you need to write a lot, and you need to read. Therefore, make yourself comfortable, we will figure out what aggression is, what its types are and how to cope with verbal aggression.

A strong person can afford to be gentle and good-natured,
while aggression and cockiness are the lot of the weak.
Icewind dale

What is aggression?

Aggression is an emotional actdirected at another person, accompanied by a desire to do something bad to him. Although this desire does not always exist. But this is already a matter of the force of aggression. We need this reaction by nature. If you look at the animal world, then their aggression is aimed at establishing their own rules and protecting their lives.

Fear can often be the cause of aggression. In this case, a person or an animal chooses the "attack" strategy. Thanks to this, he has a chance to survive. Also, aggression helps a person to establish their own rules and manage in certain situations. Moreover, aggression is essential to establish power.

Types of aggression

Aggression, like any phenomenon in our world, can be classified. Knowing what kind of aggression the other person or you have at the moment will help you choose the right strategy of behavior. But this will be discussed in more detail in the main part of the article, how to deal with aggression.

Verbal and non-verbal aggression

Verbal aggression is a verbal attack on another person, which is expressed in outbursts of anger, screaming, threats or other acts that can only cause psychological trauma to another person. But at the same time, verbal aggression does not harm physical health in most cases.

She is just unpleasant and she also needs to be able to resist. After all, verbal aggression can sometimes do more harm than non-verbal. A person can throw himself into a noose, upset by an attitude a certain person to yourself. This is naturally not good.

If a person knows how to resist verbal aggression, then he has a second wind. In addition, he looks much better in the eyes of others. After all, if you are able to competently fend off attacks from other people, even verbal ones, then such a person seems more confident in himself. And this personality trait is very useful for a person and his achievement of success.

The more successful a person is, the more he has to deal with verbal aggression. After all, he has a lot of envious people and just people who are not afraid to express their opinion. If every person who shows aggression is offended and does not know how to react to him, then you can really go crazy.

Non-verbal aggression is actions that are not related to the person's words... A person does not come across it so often, since words can often be connected to the non-verbal. It can be of varying intensity and character, so non-verbal aggression can be harmful or not.

Non-verbal aggression is a danger to another person when it is active. Then various dangerous items and other goodies can be used. If it is hidden, then it does not pose a danger to humans.

Such aggression is expressed only in certain gestures, complexion, posture, look. Moreover, the rule works that if somewhere a person suppresses the external manifestations of his aggression, then all the same they crawl through in other gestures or poses.

Direct and indirect verbal aggression

We continue to analyze the classification of types of aggression in more detail. We will now look at types such as direct and indirect. In principle, based on their name, the content of these varieties becomes clear.

Direct aggression is directed directly at the object and performs its function with the greatest strength.

As a result, direct verbal aggression is much harder to endure than indirect one. After all, direct aggression is directed directly at you, and who knows how you will react. Many factors lie here, such as life experience, attitude, self-confidence of the person to whom aggression is directed, as well as the ability to resist this pressure at the right time.

There are a lot of examples of direct aggression. These are murders, fights, quarrels - in all these things, aggression is directed primarily at the person himself. Each member of the skirmish acts both as a subject and as an object of aggressive interaction, constantly inciting each other.

Our task is simple enough. There is no need to succumb to aggressive provocations. It must be remembered that they carry water to the offended. Don't waste your time getting overly emotional.

There is no need to respond with aggression to aggression, as this has sad prospects. Not a single murder or rape on a domestic basis happened just like that. It's even funny. People are mostly sorry to harm. But in a state of increased aggressiveness, it is quite possible to do this.

Indirect aggression is not directed directly at you, but it is about you... Examples of indirect aggression can be both relatively harmless types, such as absentee ridicule or face-to-face, but not directed at the object of ridicule, and offensive. You need to look at the situation and understand that it is much easier to overcome indirect aggression.

Indirect aggression can sometimes be even more harmful than direct aggression. Especially when someone starts complaining about you to their boss. Such "snitching" can lead to very sad consequences, so you need to be vigilant in both eyes so as not to provoke others to this kind of indirect aggression.

If you find it difficult to fight different kinds aggression, then you need to read the next section of this article. Then you will have noticeable results. So how do you deal with aggression?

How to deal with verbal aggression?

The fight against aggression is a necessary element in the life of every person. After all, there is not a single iron man, everyone can get angry.

Sometimes aggression can stimulate our thinking and striving to achieve a goal. Therefore, you need to be able to distinguish between healthy aggression and unhealthy verbal aggression in the first place.

As mentioned earlier, verbal verbal aggression can stimulate not only your performance, but also this parameter in other people. There are two types of aggression:

1. Self-aggression.
2. Aggression from others.

Self-aggression is when you get annoyed... If you do not learn how to independently remove (not suppress, namely remove) negative emotions within yourself, then you will not be able to resist the aggression of other people. After all, every person who pours such behavior into the outside world, in fact, becomes a provocateur who is just waiting to prevent you from living in peace.

Moreover, some people simply like to provoke others. Some get moral pleasure from this, and some even manage to get material chips in this way, compromising you for unfavorable behavior. Moreover, even an ordinary offense can develop into aggression.

It is known that there are two types of resentment:

1. Introverted, closed type. Then the person simply does not want to communicate with the one at whom he is offended.
2. Extroverted. This type is most often a direct consequence of the first, although there are exceptions. This type of people always shows offense in an aggressive form.

It could be revenge or a fight. If we do not learn not to be offended, then even the most notorious person can come before that. Moreover, they even get more aggression over time due to the fact that they swallow resentment and accumulate it. The shootings in schools were organized by those students who were persecuted and who harbored a grudge against the whole world.

Aggression from other people is when the source and provocateur is the verbal aggressor... It is important to say that this division is rather arbitrary, since aggression is, first of all, a mutual act. If one person does not reciprocate it, the aggression immediately loses its power or fades away altogether. Therefore, it is important to understand this thing.

The best way to deal with aggression is not to respond! Do not even tolerate, since volitional efforts always end. You just need to not attach much importance to the aggression that is directed at you by other people. Trust me, it's not worth it. Any aggression ends negatively.

It has already been proven that most of the negative emotions provoke the appearance of cancerous tumors. In addition, negative emotions tend to plant themselves completely in our brain, so it will be more and more difficult to get out of the abyss of negativity. Yes, this is the same addiction as drug addiction, as negative emotions also affect motivational components in our brains.

This is the only way negative motivation works. I want to avoid unfavorable situations. But how to live if we avoid everything that we see in this world. We need to learn not only not to react to aggression from other people, but we also need to just let it go deaf ears. No one will help you with this, only you yourself can cope with the problems that are in your heads.

conclusions

You need to learn how to manage your own emotional state. They are acquired for a very long time, it takes decades. But why not try. There will be where to strive. Believe me, the secret of iron nerves is only in your head. Any emotion is nothing more than a banal physiological reaction. Therefore, actively inspire yourself with the right thoughts to make life easier.

Video presentation

You can also view the presentation of the article in video format:

in psychology

on the topic: "Verbal aggression"

11-B grade students

Gymnasium number 5

Lomova Anna

G. Melitopol

Verbal aggression is words that hurt and make a person believe that he is probably an idea of \u200b\u200bthe world around him and about himself.

General characteristics verbal aggression:

1. Verbal aggression destroys. It is especially destructive when the aggressor pretends that nothing is happening. The partner feels aggression, but his feelings are not taken into account, his opinion is not taken into account, he becomes even more painful from the feeling of confusion and disappointment.

2. Verbal aggression strikes at a partner's self-esteem and abilities. He himself begins to believe that something is wrong with him, that he has no abilities, that he does not perceive the world correctly.

3. Verbal aggression can be open (angry attacks and insults) or covert (very subtle and gradual, brainwashing). Overt aggression is usually accusations of something that the partner has never done or even thought to do. Latent aggression - stealthy aggression is even more destructive. The purpose of such aggression is to subjugate a partner so that he himself does not know about it.

4. In verbal aggression, expressions of contempt can be very sincere and clear.

5. Verbal aggression is by nature manipulative and seeks to control another person. Usually the victim does not realize that she is being controlled and manipulated. She may notice, however, that her life is not going at all the way she planned, and of course there is no joy in her life.

6. Verbal aggression is insidious. The one from whom verbal aggression emanates, treats his partner, shows contempt and devaluation of him so that:

The victim's self-esteem drops significantly, despite the fact that she does not notice it.

The victim loses self-confidence without realizing it.

The victim may consciously or unconsciously try to change his behavior style so as not to irritate the aggressor and so that he no longer hurts her.

The victim may not accept this, but she is methodically brainwashed.

7. Verbal aggression is unpredictable. Unpredictability is one of the main characteristics of verbal aggression. The partner is literally knocked out and ruts, bewildered, shocked by angry, sarcastic jokes, injections and comments of the aggressor.

No matter how smart and educated the victim is, she never manages to prepare for an attack, and even more so she will never be able to understand why she is being attacked and how to avoid the attack.

8. Verbal aggression is a relationship building problem. When a married couple is faced with a real problem about a real fact of life, for example, if the question arises of raising responsibility in children or how much time to spend together and apart, everyone can be angry, but both sides can say: “I am angry about this or this "or" I want this. " And naturally, if they are driven by good will, they eventually come to a compromise, that is, the problem is resolved. In relations with verbal aggression, there is no conflict as such. The very fact of aggression is a problem, and this issue is not resolved. That is, this problem is not resolved.

9. Verbal aggression contains a double message. There is a constant contrast between what the aggressor is telling you and his true feelings for you. For example, he seems sincere and honest when he tells his partner that something is wrong with him, or he may say: “No, I’m not angry at all!” - but in fact he says this with malice. Or he can invite his partner to have dinner at a restaurant, and during dinner, behave aloof with him, indifferently, as if he does not understand what the partner is doing here at all.

10. Verbal aggression tends to intensify, it becomes more intense, frequent and takes on more and more sophisticated forms. For example, at the initial stage of communication, the aggressor can only attack a partner with malicious attacks under the guise of jokes or restraint, gradually he adds other forms of aggression.

In many cases, verbal aggression turns into physical aggression, which, in turn, also does not begin immediately, but gradually, with "unintentional" pushes, kicks, slaps, hits, etc., which then turn into direct beating.

As the verbal aggression intensifies, turning into physical violence, the aggressor begins to invade the partner's personal space.

Verbal aggression and power over others

We see that verbal aggression makes it difficult to build real relationships. It seems obvious. Nevertheless, the partner of the aggressor can live his whole life with the illusion that there is a real relationship between them. He will think so for several reasons. The main reason will be that as a married couple they can function quite adequately, fulfilling the roles prescribed by society.

Verbal aggressors usually express most of their emotions in anger. For example, if the aggressor feels insecure and anxious, he may immediately fall into anger, that is, angry at the fact that he suddenly felt insecure and uneasy. Meanwhile, a person is naturally endowed with the ability to experience emotions. This ability to feel, like the ability to think, is universal for human nature. Unfortunately, the aggressor often does not want to accept his own feelings, and even more so to show his true feelings to his partner. He builds a kind of wall between himself and his partner. He artificially creates a distance in communication.

1. Closure

2. Eagerness to object

3. The desire to devalue the achievements and feelings of another.

4. Verbal aggression in the form of jokes.

5. Blocking and distortion of information.

6. Exposing and accusing another.

7. Criticism and condemnation of another.

8. Variety of the meaning of what is happening.

9. Denial of emotional support.

10. Threats

11. Name-calling

12. Command tone.

13. Forgetting and denying facts.

1. Closure

If there is a relationship between people, then communication should be more than just the exchange of information. Relationships mean closeness. Mental closeness implies empathy, empathy. Hearing and understanding another's feelings means empathizing. Mental closeness is impossible if one of the communicating parties does not want to speak openly about feelings, emotions, experiences, that is, does not want to share something and support a partner.

An aggressor who refuses to listen to his partner, denies his feelings, refuses to share his thoughts and feelings - first of all, violates the main unwritten law of relationships. He shows isolation.

Closure, silence, restraint in manifestations acts worse than words and shouts and is a category of verbal aggression. In other words, isolation is a way of behavior when a person keeps all thoughts, feelings, dreams and hopes to himself, and with a partner remains cold, aloof, trying to express himself as little as possible.

"What is there to talk about?"

"What do you want to hear from me?"

"What I've done? I'm listening to you."

"No, it won't interest you"

“Why are you asking my opinion? You will do whatever you want anyway. "

These answers are very disappointing. And the partner may think that their relationship is quite normal, because the companion communicates with you on business issues. At the same time, relationships become meaningless because they lack emotional closeness. In addition to business communication, there are 2 more types of communication. Here are three lists that illustrate all three types of communication.

Communication on business issues:

I'm coming late today.

List on the table.

Do you need help?

Who left this here?

Where is my hammer?

The light is off.

Gasoline will run out soon, we need to refuel.

Communication - sharing thoughts:

Well, what do you think about that?

Just listen to what happened to me when I ...

I was thinking ...

Have you ever thought about ...?

And what do you like…?

What did you think ...?

But most of all I liked…

I feel…

When you're free, let's talk?

Communication is the answer to the exchange of thoughts:

I understand what you mean.

Yes, I understand you.

Interesting.

I didn't even think about it.

Wow!

Well, you must! I always thought…

Are you saying that ...

What are you thinking about?

Do you think that ...?

Prediction and such types of aggression as physical, indirect, verbal and guilt. 2.4 Analysis of the results of an empirical study of the relationship between predictive ability and aggression in adolescence Final stage empirical study is analytical. It aims to summarize the results of the study and a more open description of the conclusions on the done ...

In general, it is of considerable interest precisely for "normal" personality psychology. Autoaggression, as we could see above, is, as a rule, low self-esteem and self-rejection. This is already quite sufficient grounds for the emergence of difficulties of a socio-psychological nature associated with the establishment of contacts and the implementation of productive communication. What is actually fixed on ...

Science and having a high social significance, recently attracts more and more attention of researchers. The study of individual, external and social factors affecting aggressive behavior. Behavior, according to most social psychologists, is a joint function of the individual and his environment. That is, the behavior of an individual in society is determined ...

Their influence on the appearance aggressive behavior · Propose technologies and methods for the prevention and correction of aggressive behavior in adolescents Chapter I. Research of the problem of manifestation of aggression in children and adolescents 1.1 Concept of the term aggression, types of aggression Under aggression is usually understood deliberate actions that cause or intend to harm another person, a group of people ...

Aggression in psychology

Aggression in psychology is defined as a special type of behavior that is aimed solely at harming both living people and inanimate objects. As a rule, such a manifestation serves as a reaction to all kinds of mental or physical frustrations, discomfort,stress s. In some cases, aggression can be used to achieve a certain goal, for example, for self-affirmation or obtaining a certain status.

If motivated aggression (with a reason) is a completely natural manifestation of human nature, then unmotivated aggression (without a reason) is already a serious reason to turn to a psychotherapist.

Attacks of aggression: how to win?

For many people, bouts of aggression, or, more simply, quick temper, greatly interfere with their lives. Let's look at several ways to tame your nature:

• drink a glass of water;
• concentrate on breathing, inhale and exhale slowly;
• get distracted, remember something good;
• mentally count from 10 to 1;
• relax your body - face, arms, legs, move away from the problem;
• pinch yourself several times.

If such methods do not help you, this is a reason to contact a professional. Only a psychotherapist can figure out the causes and find a solution to the problem.

Physical aggression -

The use of physical force against a physical object, another person, a social group. Physical aggression is manifested by certain psychomotor acts observed from the outside, often represented by one or another sequence of them (jolts, blows, beatings, torture, etc.)

The first is physical aggression towards oneself (its behavioral signs: scratching, pinching itself, tearing hair, beating itself, breaking fists, throwing itself on the floor, inflicting superficial wounds and burns on itself, causing serious damage to itself).

The second is physical aggression towards objects (its behavioral signs: an individual slams doors, tears clothes, throws things down, stains walls, breaks things and breaks windows, makes a fire, and spoils valuable property).

The third is physical aggression directed at others (its behavioral signs: the individual swings to strike, grabs the opponent by his clothes, threatens him with unambiguous gestures, hits, pulls him by the hair; attacks, causing light damage; causes serious injury).

Verbal aggression

FROM the symbolic form of aggression in the form of causing psipsychological harm with the use of predominantly vocal (shouting, change in tone) and verbal components of speech (invective, insults, etc.). It is expressed using lexes of aggression (see). At the same time, the fact of causing harm must be real and obviously obvious to both the aggressor for the aggressor and his victim.

Verbal aggression can be overt or covert. Open verbal aggression is manifested by a clear intention to inflict communicative damage on the addressee and is expressed in obvious humiliating forms (swearing, shouting). Such behavior often tends to turn into physical aggression when the aggressor shamelessly invades the addressee's personal space (see aggression transfers). Latent verbal aggression is systematic and derogatory pressure on the addressee, but without the open manifestation of hostile emotions.

Verbal aggression makes you feel resentment, depression, anger, it is possible that you will not slow down with a response. Thus, you can succumb to verbal abuse as a result of impolite service to you in the store. Often non-physical aggression occurs between spouses, parent and children.

How to deal with verbal aggression?

If you feel that you have become a victim of an aggressor, try to pull yourself together and not respond rudely. This will only aggravate the situation by creating unnecessary conflicts. In the case when it seems that a little more and verbal aggression will fall on you, mentally place yourself in a glass case, through which the interlocutor's negative will not affect your peaceful state.

Non-verbal aggression is a series of signals that indicate the aggressive mood of your interlocutor. In other words, sign language shows the latter's intentions regarding your personality.

Indirect aggression

- aggressive actions presented in a hidden, disguised form. They are indirectly directed at a certain person (group, offspring, cultural norm, moral principle, religious dogma, etc.) - the true victim of aggression. Examples of indirect aggression include vandalism, defamation, malicious rumors, and so on. A special kind of indirect aggression, from the green's point of view, is environmental damage. The persons who inflict it usually realize that the damage they inflict on nature threatens, first of all, future generations, but the pests themselves are more important than the motives of their own enrichment or some other, equally personal or narrow-group. Sometimes, indirect aggression is called actions that are characterized by their lack of direction and disorder, such as explosions of rage or punching on the table (Meshcheryakov, Zinchenko, 2004). At the same time, the direction of such actions is carefully hidden or not realized by the subject of aggression himself.

NEGATIVISM

H agativism (English negativism; from Lat.negatio - negation) - unreasonable resistance of the subject to the influences exerted on him. The concept of negativism was originally used only in relation to pathological phenomena that arise in certain forms of mental illness. In mentally ill patients, N. can manifest itself not only in relation to the influences of other people, but also in connection with the action of internal impulses (delays in speech, movements, and some physiological functions).

Currently, this concept has acquired a broader meaning: it is used in pedagogy and psychology to denote any seemingly unmotivated resistance to someone else's influence. N. arises as a defensive reaction to influences that conflict with the needs of the subject. In these cases, refusal to comply with the requirement is a way to get out of the conflict and release from its traumatic influence. Most often, N. occurs in children in relation to the requirements of adults, presented without taking into account the needs of children. Negativism increases with states of fatigue or overexcitement n. from. (cm. Children's negativism ).

N.'s form is stubbornness, behind which is the motive of self-affirmation. Negativism and stubbornness are united by the fact that they arise on the basis of a person's subjective states, while ignoring objectively existing goals (cf.Persistence ).

Such a concept as verbal in modern society is quite common. If we take it apart in parts, then aggression is a negative phenomenon of a destructive nature, and "verbal" means that it manifests itself in the psychological aspect, in the process of human communication. So, this is the desire of one or several individuals to humiliate the dignity and feelings of others. Such aggression can manifest itself in the form of critical statements, condemnation.

Verbal and non-verbal aggression

Verbal aggression makes you feel resentment, depression, anger, it is possible that you will not slow down with a response. Thus, you can succumb to verbal abuse as a result of impolite service to you in the store. Often non-physical aggression occurs between spouses, parent and children.

Non-verbal is a series of signals that indicate an aggressive attitude of your interlocutor. In other words, sign language shows the latter's intentions regarding your personality.

Physical and verbal aggression

In most cases, frequent manifestations of physical hostility are inherent in men, while verbal - in women. So, the first type of aggression is expressed in the deliberate breakage of various objects, deliberate slamming of front doors, banging with a fist on the table surface (such manifestations are indirect). Direct physical aggression occurs when a person is attacked.

Direct verbal is verbal abuse that is voiced to the person in the face, and indirect - behind the back.

Verbal aggression in adolescents

The frequency of manifestation of aggressive traits in the behavior of a teenager depends, first of all, on how the child's upbringing was in the first years of his life. According to research, boys are characterized by physical and direct verbal aggression, while girls are characterized by direct verbal and indirect aggression (the latter is considered the most common).

It should be emphasized that the greatest manifestation of verbal aggression is found in period of 14-15 years. This is due to gender and age characteristics. In adolescents, who are characterized by a striving for leadership, high self-esteem, the level of manifestation of such aggression is much higher.

How to deal with verbal aggression?

If you feel that you have become a victim of an aggressor, try to pull yourself together and not respond rudely. This will only aggravate the situation by creating unnecessary conflicts. In the case when it seems that a little more and verbal aggression will fall on you, mentally place yourself in a glass case, through which the negative of the interlocutor will not affect your peaceful state.